It is mine!

i wanna be heppy.

looks charming all day long.

i wanna be everyone best friend.

believing that love is true.

enjoying every single little things of my life.

freedom with limit.

no sorrow haunting.

forgetting all bout misery of life.

i dont care if nobody care me coz i dont care them too.

im still here, in this perfect world, living the life to the fullest, hope so, and my life, it just me and only me who deserve to decide whats life im going to live. im moron and surviving alone. im wearing my own slippers not yours. i eat in plate not on grave. my tounge in my mouth and its not yours. the skin is mine, you got one too. my colour is mine. so if u wanna ruin one life, please ruin yours not mine. because i already did and im not hoping it for the second times.

Pieces of Heart

Dear Uuu,
Sorry im not a good lover as i did before.
Sorry I cant spend so much time with u as I've being so busy.
Sorry my love not strong enough like as u love me.
Sorry I cant take care of u very well coz I'm so far from u.
Sorry if u felt like i dunt care much bout u.
Sorry I cant be ur gud n loyal companion every each time.
Sorry for making u sad while im happy
Sorry for hurting u but i didnt meant it
Sorry for broke ur heart coz i dun noe ur heart was so fragile
Sorry I cant take it anymore.
Sorry for everything as there are so much sorry that i wanna say.
Sorry. Thats all i can say :'( nothing much i can do.

U such a good lover. & I wanna LOVE U. but I cant ;( i dont deserve for u. I try so hard before. & pretending that I'm so in luv wif u. But actually its only just not more dari perasaan suka & sayang. Rite now i belief theres no cinta from me for u. I lie u while i trying to luv u. I fail to fall in love wif u =(( Once again, Im sorry...

I have a teribble life before which is nobody knows bout this, and the only one knows is my family but not all they know bout it :) & i have ever promise to myself to face it alone and wont tell it to anyone. The past leave me a big scar which i cant forget! Now, there are no more tears anymore. But tonite all that burst & hurt me again. & i cant keep it any longer. The time have come. & it burst. Everything juz hit on my head. and i cant think any. I'm hopeless. So, i'll let it go one by one....

I dont want u to be like one of my past. So, i'll let u go first as i also cant love u sincerely :( Its better to hurt rite now than to be hurt later, coz i know it much more painfull..

I Love U. yes. but, the love only a love of a fren :) not more than that. Hope u'll understand :)

Take care dear. & Thx for everything :) & Hopefully u'll get a better life after this & get someone who can really love u, take care of u & make u happy ever after :D

With Love,
Red :)

i found this message which i sent to you when you were at Aussie for your medical treatment as I cant go and visit you there while you really hope that i'll be beside you on that time. since i sent you the message i never get any reply from you. still im waiting and wondering why. i know i have hurt you. but at least give me a response. but you just left me quitly and you hurt me more than i do. i really want to explain why. but i cant find you. i lost you and left me with tears all night. untill one day i decide to leave all the memories of you and start a new day with forgetting you. glad i did it. but its not easy. still wondering if you have forgiven me or not. a long time had gone. but suddenly i remember you when i found this message. i have no choice. i cant forget you just like that as you are part of my memories. so why do i have throw all the memories away as i have been through it before. i know its hurt before. but you are the one who had bring the happiness and love to my life. you will be the one of the memorable memories of mine. i wonder if i never meet you maybe i wont know the meaning of life, friendship and love. i would like to thank you for all the change you have made in my life. Now i got a lot of friends and i found love. and i hope you so. i just want to know are you still remember me? will you forgive me? can we be friend back as you are the best friend i have ever had? i hope you will read this and get back to me soon. remember im always waiting for your forgiveness. :)

Missing My Good Time ♥

i miss my past. my really good past. the best memories ever.

i ♥ my family. i ♥ my friends. i ♥ my cats.

i ♥ my school. i ♥ my teachers. i ♥ homeworks.

i ♥ to chill. i ♥ to hang. i ♥ to gossip.

i ♥ my freedom with limit.

i ♥ when life was being fair towards me.

i ♥ when i feel very close to Him.

i ♥ im doing the good things.

i ♥ that i hate the bad things.

i ♥ when my mom & dad proud of me.

i ♥ that i have no boyfriend.

i ♥ i could be friends with anybody even with drug addict.

i ♥ my time was very valueable.

i ♥ that i could sing happily with no worry.

i ♥ i could decide on my own.

i ♥ my family always support me.

i ♥ nobody hate me.

i ♥ my life. :)

still

i ♥ my life

even now life is treating me like underdog.

even i lost my good time.

even im going to the bottom of life wheel.

even the happiness is not mine, even it is, its not real.

even i have to pretend that im good.

even my smile is fake.

even my family no longer trust me.

even i lost a lot of friends.

even i lost my love.

even i lost my bright future.

even i regret with what im doing.

even the time cannot return back.

even i have to cry everytime with no reason.

even people think i have lost my mind.

even everybody hate me.

no matter what i still ♥ what life im going through.

=)

FYI

aku ada blog.

so?

aku tak pernah update pun.

why?

takde idea lar.

why?

lack of idea.

&%$#@

aku si pemalas update blog.

Ooo. :)

So jangan harap lah aku akan rajin mengupdatekan blog oke ;) Daa~